long fuckin floater trot dat be tween Gate an Moot – fuck
met me kinsman Dori Black’ammer gain in da Gems – we trottin ta Felbarr we dids – kin dere presentin me wit a Samman Rune an tankin dem big I was – honored ta walk da halls I is – da forge unner Felbarr be a sight I neer magined dese orbs eer spy – someplacin I opes one day ta werk when me trottin be done – tis why I spends all day werkin me smackblocker right perfected – sumday I be known fer me smackblockers – an da forge o Felbarr be wheres I opes I ends up
Payin homage ta Gorm an Dumathoin aye – All Fadder an Mudder too – shrines an churches be spread high an wide – felt like deys be smiling on a dwarf like no odder times I be prayed
so I back gain in da Gate – doin me jobs – makin me pennies – done kilt a spidey big as a draft orse wit Dane backin me in da unnerground sewers – fuckin stinks like mudders tree-day-old mushy pie down dere – so I guess it ent dat bad now dat I tinks of it –
i been vestigatin dem rumours o dems poor sods oo bein beaten n skinned in da docks – Dane e beese elpin too – loss im fer a whiles thou so I beese doin me own sneakin bout on me lonesome in da docks lissenin fer spits o whot moight be round an whass been appenin – same same stuffs – peoples all in a tizzy as mens an womens too stunned ta knows da difference ta not knowin nuff ta be wanderin on da lonesome at night – some een taken when deyse wit a mate –
someone all bout enjoyin given sufferin an miseries ta odders – bad business no fears ta say it – so I beese letting wanderers know ta git tha fuck off da roads in tha nighttime mostly – pparently tha misrable basserds waits fer a lonesome pigeon wanderin in dere cups er whot ave ye and dey GRABS EM an BEATS EM den sometoimes SKINS EM TOO – fuck –
so I runs inta diss missus all covered in steels in da docks eh – I askin er ifn she be willin ta get all gussied up in a dress an ave me trot long behind er fer a trot er two in da nighttime lurin da fuckers out – well sweet saviours ye neer guessin it but SHE bein da bitch oo be doin da skinning – den she calls out ta er patron da Maiden o Pain Loviatar an done tryin ta smack ME down – well I neer eard nar seen nuthin like diss missus first nor nay last – so whot I do but I smacks dat bitch right up side er fuckin noggin to da ground dass whot I did – bitch –
den Dane showin up elpin me out an some poor sod watchman too aye – I bese tryin ta drag dat bitch ta da watch capn an er lass efforts done sucked da life outta dat poor sod watchman endin es life fer goods – Gordon be es names – done leff a widow too poor hunny – I sposin I be goin fer a spit wit er too soon aye – mebbe el per out wit a few pennies – so Dane an I gives er anudder real good tannin – beats er down an brings er in – not da widow… da pain bitch dat one – anyway dey locks er up an be given Dane an I some bounty een thou I be da one taken er down – dass awight I dinna minds – Dane be needin coppers too aye –
soon I be goin back ta dem docks – findin out ifn dat bitch be lone er ave a crew round – but firss capn tellin me we cen talk ta dat bitch gain – mebbe tan er up a bit findin out more info
dere – finelly got da shankster slimy stinkin basserds face down from me noggin ta diss book aye – now ifn I sees a few more dem long legged swindlers afor I re-sees Maren least I knows ill amember dat fuckers mug sur as sur – be eadin down ta Nashkel gain sooner den soon cen be which be as soon as I knows soon cen be dass fer sur as sur – huntin fer furries bit easier den huntin fer men – deyse be a might pre-dictable dem furries – but sometimes dem long leggers – specially dem long leggers – deyse juss plain ornry make yer guts turn –
but I garantees ya mudder – ill find im – firss eel knows es dyin fer Eowane – den es ead be mine
planning me bunker goin well – nar found a good spot juss yit – needin a good load o qualitee granite – opefully wit a few veins o silver mayhap even gold fer fundin – gonna be deep inta da earth but gonna be opefully near da sea or a thick river fer travelin – needin fresh water supply – defensable – opefully up along da Felbarr trail er close ta da outskirts o Delzoun mayhaps – mebbe gut out a cavern awready in use be some gnoll er orc clan – mayhaps be thankin dem fer startin it fer me juss afor dey get chopped -
be needin a few whot dem long leggers calls “home comforts” like…
a quarry – port – workshop – cellars few meats spuds kegs mushrooms wines brews ales n meads – arena – tavern – a smithy er two – forge – big forge – grand hall – barracks – church – kitchen – brewery – meat smokehouse – iceroom – barrel room – library – war room – smokin room fer baccy - tactics hall – armory – trophy hall – mausoleum – jail – living quarters – guest room er two – water wells – traps – few more traps – mebbe juss a few more traps – an a bloody nice dungeon fer ‘special guests’ - heh
dass not tae bad – once I guts out a cavern – redoes all that walls n such –
bess save me pennies now – gonna need supplies – escavatin – finishin – building – I cen do most o dat -
Last edited by Galadorn on Wed Jun 01, 2016 1:29 am, edited 2 times in total.
centipedes – fuck me – kilt da mommy where dey comin from now – fucked ifn I knows
few odd cases up long in da Gate I be meetin – long legger n a shorty – trotted em hup ta Ulgoths Whisker fer ta be droppin off packagin fer dems lot up dere -
Nerugi – well fek it all diss one got sum fumble-rocks rollin round es noggin sur as sur – quiet type – so nar sur ta be trustin im da once – walk slow – spittin wishful spits o da patrons watchin oer us all – yada yada fuck – pick up a sticker son we be trottin trou hazardin roads – meh
Buttermere – well oill be diss one spits like es at da royale galas o old – wizzardy type – pole n all – but nar breachin tree feet – mayhaps e be lookin fer anudder pole ta use as stilts I dinna knows er cares –
made me teary upalong Ulgoths da mistress o da place Hannah be tellin us dems fishery-men ent be catchin nar no nae fishies numore – fuck an I tought da sea be chocka blocked wit dem fishies meself – tollin me dems families be outta food too sose I be passin on me gold ta dems poor sods – fitty gold coin outta elp out fer a while – dat be buyin a ton o spuds id wager – meebe I trots up dere gain an vestigate sum – find out whot be happenin wit dems fishies – althou fuck dat ifn dey needs me out floatin round in a shit box boat hells be nar fury as ta dat shit – I be vestigating wit bote feets on solids no damn fears ta sayin dat -
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*sniff sniff*