A Land Far Away

Next the leftist nutjobs here at ALFA will tell us its McCains fault that 4e sucks so bad

Lusipher wrote:Next the leftist nutjobs here at ALFA will tell us its McCains fault that 4e sucks so bad

IT IS!

Lusipher wrote:Next the leftist nutjobs here at ALFA will tell us its McCains fault that 4e sucks so bad

McCain would never be able to remember all the rules to play anyway. He has enough "Oh Grampa..." moments as is, the last thing I'd want to see is him trying to remember how an initiative roll works.

I approve of your gritty Kermit avatar

DM: Okay, you guys have read the rules?

McCain: My friend, I have.

Palin: What's all these gods and spells about now then? Necromancy? *flips through book* Them Chick Tracts were right!

McCain: Oh, now now Sarah. We're learning this game to get some credibility with younger voters.

DM: Like ones that were born after the invention of the written word.

McCain: Right. Wait, what?

DM: Anyway... do you have your characters ready?

McCain: Yes sir.

Palin: Yup! Right here.

DM: Okay, let me see your character sheets.

*peruses their character sheets*

DM: Hmm. Okay. John, your level one dwarven fighter here, he can't have seven castles.

McCain: What? Why not?

DM: Well, you have to start from humble beginnings.

McCain: But my character's father was an admiral in the navy.

DM: Hmm. Well, I suppose I can allow it, but don't expect to hold on to them.

Palin: Ooh, you can do that? I want 150,000 gp worth of armor!

McCain: I buy it for her.

DM: Oh, come on.

McCain: Read the sheet, my character has tons of money.

DM: *sighs* Alright, whatever. Let's see... Sarah, it says here you're a Palin-din?

Palin: Yup! *wink*

DM: Did you mean 'Paladin?'

Palin: What's the difference?

DM: Spelling, I suppose. Oh, here's a problem. You left your deity field empty.

Palin: Oh, yah, you betcha. Put me down as a Palin-din for Christ.

DM: Jesus Christ isn't a god in this campaign.

Palin: Well he is now! *wink! grin!* My guy is a Maverick!

DM: *through gritted teeth* Fine. Okay. You arrive in the village of Bridgeportburgton. As you are walking through the village square a Priest of Pelor approaches and says "Please, oh travellers, you must help! The village has fallen upon terrible fortune!"

Palin: I smite evil on the heathen witch. Wah-chow! *karate chops*

DM: What? Why? It's a priest of Pelor, the goodly god of the sun and healing.

Palin: Yup, evil witch!

DM: ... alright, roll to hit.

Palin: Which one do I roll? Ooh, this triangle one? This is a fun one!

DM: The one with 20 sides.

Palin: Oh, gotcha. *counts the sides on all the dice*

DM: ...

Palin: *finds the d20, rolls* I rolled a 20, what does that mean?

DM: Okay, you hit. Roll again to confirm a critical.

Palin: A what? But I already rolled. Just move my character up 20 spaces.

DM: That's not how it works, go ahead and roll that die again.

Palin: Gosh, this game is complicated! *wink grin wink cutesy face!!!*

*rolls again, crits*

DM: Okay, you got a critical hit. You have a longsword and that does 1d8 damage.

Palin: So I roll again?

DM: yes.

Palin: *finds the d8, rolls* I got a 7.

DM: okay, 7 plus your strength bonus gives us 9, times 2 is 18... you damage the cleric for 18 HP and kill him.

Palin: Maverick!

DM: Alright, John, it's your turn.

McCain: ...

DM: Uh... John?

McCain: *snores loudly*

DM: Phew, thought we'd lost him for a second.

Palin: Yah, he dozes off from time to time. So did we win?

DM: *thinks a moment* Yes, you won. Congratulations.

Palin: Yippee!

McCain: *snore* ... solemnly swear ...*snore* ... *mumbles* protect and defend the constimrgle ... *snore* ... so help me ...

Palin: Aww, isn't that precious, he's dreamin' again!

Lusipher wrote:Next the leftist nutjobs here at ALFA will tell us its McCains fault that 4e sucks so bad

No.

It's your fault.

LOL!

4E is pretty solid.

Cheap way out mechanical wise in many aspects, but solid and well playable.

Pathos Street wrote:DM: Okay, you guys have read the rules?

...snip...

Palin: Aww, isn't that precious, he's dreamin' again!

Dude. Funneh. This belongs in the wider world of nerddom. For realz!

Veilan wrote:4E is pretty solid.

Cheap way out mechanical wise in many aspects, but solid and well playable.

Its extremely boring. They toned it down even Zic could figure out how to play it.

Meh. That pic is so horribly photoshopped.

~Kill~

Can you tell by the pixels, and from having seen many 'shops in your time?

Mayhem wrote:Can you tell by the pixels, and from having seen many 'shops in your time?

haaaa!